I think I’ll lie down, stretch out; it’s
always nice on the big high couch.
In the sun spot, I can feel the warmth
until she comes in wanting a hug.
Why are people so needy?
Can’t they see I’m busy?
My perfect looks take all day;
licking my fur now and then.
Treats, chicken and duck are my favourites,
not the muck that comes in packets.
I want real meat, not animal offal
I assure you the stuff is really awful.
So it’s time for their bed, lights out; when
I knock over a glass I can hear them shout.
If I had what I wanted, I wouldn’t do this,
so feed me now and stop taking the piss.